‘Doing nothing’ is doing something
No secret it’s been a few months since my last radio show. I’ve since been taking sometime to myself. Inconsistent with my social media. Not the only thing I’ve been inconsistent with. Let me count the ways… lack of motivation to hit the gym, complete shit at returning texts/phone calls/emails, cooking for myself is few and far between, thinking about cleaning the house instead of doing it, watching the laundry pile up, getting half way through a job application and becoming disinterested with the idea of it, indecisive as to which direction I want to go in next, making plans and cancelling them because I don’t feel like small talk, etc… Hearing things like ‘I’ve seen your social media and it looks like all you’ve been doing is having fun and drinking’. Let’s explore that perception, shall we?
A) What I show on social media is subjective and very selective. Some is business and collaborations other times it’s adventure and good times with friends. What you don’t see are the nights spent alone journaling. Days spent exploring different career paths. Participating in interviews. Meetings with people I look up to and those who inspire me.. Drafting introductory emails to businesses that align with my personal brand. Writing comedy sketches as a form of therapy. Therapy. Decluttering my living space, out with the old and in with the new. Navigating my family life, which is a full time job on it’s own. Managing exceptions I have of others and myself.
B) Previously the longest Ive been between jobs was 3 months. I’ve since surpassed that. Many of my years were spent juggling 3, sometimes 4 gigs at a time. To reach my radio goals I worked full time 9-5 then till 9pm sometimes later and always on weekends, well over and above my pay grade to spring board my career into what it is today. Early in my career I landed my dream gig - I BURNED MYSELF OUT. I won’t do a deep dive into my burn out, I’ll save that for another time.
Might look like ‘Doing nothing’ to you. But to me ‘doing nothing’ means reflecting on what no longer serves me, including but not limited to; my career, where I live, how I spend my time, things I talk about to things that are better left unsaid, taking note as to what does and doesn’t bring me joy, etc… Experiencing life without expectation, not for content or anyone else other than myself. A little stillness and self reflection goes a long way. Not that I owe anyone an explanation, but I did want to use this as a reminder that there’s pretty good chance you don’t know what someone else is going thru.
I’ll keep doing me unapologetically, and you keep doing you!
On that note - Have the best day!
-Pam Kirby
